Menu English

In the interests of boosting cholesterol, clogging arteries and knocking a further 27-minutes off my life-expectancy, I decide to eat a slab of greasy meat. By happy coincidence, this involves placing an order with a Swedish barmaid.

‘Bacon cheeseburger, please – without the barbecue sauce.’

She stares at me blankly, as if I’ve just spoken to her in Uzbekistani. Perhaps her English isn’t as good as I thought. Undeterred, I stab the menu with my forefinger.

‘This one,’ I say slowly and loudly, in a cod-Scandinavian accent.

‘Oh,’ she replies. ‘You mean you want the barbecue burger without barbecue sauce.’

2 Responses to “Menu English”

  1. stinkypaw Says:

    Loving this! Once (or more!) I did order a sub without the bread (I was doing the Atkins’ Diet) – the looks I got!

    Thanks for the link BTW! I’ll do the same!

  2. mad muthas Says:

    speaking like the swedish chef from the muppets usually does the trick with foreigners

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