Sadly, it’s not just fertile females who are unable to attend my 30th birthday party this weekend. Nevertheless, I’m expecting a respectable turnout, as I explain to the owner of the bar we’ve hired.
‘There’ll be 140 guests,’ I boast, assuming this makes me sound pretty darn popular.
‘Hmm,’ he intones cheerily. ‘You should invite more people. The venue will look weird if you don’t invite more people.’
This is obviously ironic. ‘But I’m scraping the barrel as it is,’ I chuckle, playing along. ‘Most of the people coming aren’t even my mates, ha! ha!’
‘Whatever. It’s your funeral.’
‘Erm . . .’
30! why didn’t you say? well, in that case, it might as well be your funeral, cos there’ll no fun from thursday onwards …
(we’re all doomed)
Thanks. That makes me feel much better
Well happy birthday you young thang you! Hope you have a great time!
Contrary to popular rumour, 30 doesn’t necessarily mark the end of life – merely the end of life as we know it (which I admit is almost as bad – if I remember correctly).
i have to regretfully decline this year. it’s too much of a short notice to attend. there’s the whole thing about the time difference, obtaining a passport, getting a flight out, a thoughtful birthday present… ;P
however, i do have time to wish you an early Happy Birthday!
as far inviting more guests, why not advertise and charge a cover? you can alleviate the costs that way, too.
My invitation was obviously lost in the mail. I’d love to stop by, but I’ll be celebrating my own (much older–okay not that much older) birthday this weekend as well. What day is your? Friday, I’m 37.
Have a terrific time!!
N: See above …
A: If only they’d build a tunnel under the atlantic …
M: Ditto. Have a great day. DO get drunk.
…I think I still remember 30…
Wishing you a geat one and many, many more! Being “over the hill” is much better than being under it! Remember that, and the fact that if you were a dog, you’d be dead!
Hey! I didn’t get invited! I want to come to the party too!
Happy Birthday to ya! I think 30 to 35 are some really good years, so put the funeral off until you are at least 36.
what? too burned out to post on your birthday? slacker
It’s coming, honest
30 really isn’t that bad (this is coming from someone who’s now closer to 40 than 30).
Hope you have a good one this weekend!
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